The Battle With Max

Recently I’ve been tearing my hair out trying to understand my son. Max has been whiny, argumentative and difficult which is very unlike him. I guess we could attribute it to Luke’s arrival but who knows? I’ve been trying to spend more time with him, to be more patient with him but I have to admit, it isn’t easy.

Right now, nap and bedtimes are the worst. He used to go to bed by himself, after a kiss goodnight, he would settle down and got to sleep. Now he whines about not being tired, he tosses and turns, he disturbs Ally, basically he does everything but sleep. It can take up to an hour for him to fall asleep. He is clearly tired, you can see his eye bags and he’s yawning away but trust me, that boy can sure fight fatigue.

I keep telling myself its a phase that he’ll grow out of. He is at an awkward stage at the moment as well, he’s not going to school like Ally and yet he isn’t the baby anymore. There are days where I feel like a terrible mother, simply because I feel like all I’ve done is nag/scold him.

It’s not all bad, there are days where my sweet boy emerges once again and we have great fun together. Beneath the whining and tantrums, he really is a sensitive soul who loves his brother and sister.

He looks so grown up in this photo, I love that cheeky look on his face

Polar Opposites

My two boys, such polar opposites

Luke at 2.5 months, weighing a hefty 7.5kg

Max, 3.5 years, 11kg

 

 

Nearly 3 Months Of Baby Goodness

It’s been nearly 3 months since we welcomed Luke into the family. What can I say, we are all in love with this little ( okay, not so little) guy. He is always ready with a smile and is happiest early in the morning after his bath.

In 3 months he has more than doubled his birth weight, he’s sleeping less during the day and making all sorts of adorable baby sounds.

I love the way he smells and I wish I could bottle up his baby scent to savor forever. We’re really lucky to be blessed with a baby who doesn’t seem to mind being shuttled back and forth, in and out of his car seat.

Newborn Luke, not even 6 hours old.

Two weeks old, a rare shot of him awake as he use to sleep up to 22 hours a day. Bliss

One month old and yes, he has filled up nicely. Still sleeping for most of the day.

2 months old- he stays awake for longer periods of time and is one happy little guy. He currently tips the scales at 7.2kg

Oh dear Luke, please don’t grow up so quickly! I’m really loving your babyness .

 

Just Some Photos

Max and Luke have both been down with a bad cold/cough, thankfully both boys are on the mend. It didn’t stop us from having some outdoor fun at the Botanics, we had beautiful weather, overcast but no rain.

The boys playing hide and seek

Who knew umbrellas could provide so much entertainment?

You can’t see me

Max honestly thought he had the best hiding spot

This was taken on our ” Max and Mama’s day out” at his request, we went to the airport and sat the sky train no less than 10 times

Both kids waiting for Daddy to come home from work

If you’re wondering why there are no pictures of Luke, its because he was mostly asleep in his stroller. My not so little man is now a whopping 7.2kg at 2 months, pictures to come soon.

Nasal Scope And More Decisions

Ally had her nasal scope done today, it started off alright with some simple routine procedures. Then we had to spray a numbing agent into her nose and I could see that she was thinking of the barium insertion. She hesitated but continued to be brave. On the first try she yanked the scope out, we explained to her that the more co-operative she was, the faster it would all be over. Second time around she was much better but she had difficulty swallowing her saliva so the images were rather blurry. I am really proud of her, I don’t think I would tolerate having a scope down my nose.

Watching Aunty S preparing the scope

We started off by checking her mouth, this was the easy part

The next part wasn't so pleasant as you can see from her face

Even with no medical background, I could clearly see from the tv that her soft palate and pharynx didn’t fully close as she spoke.  If you look at the picture below, when we speak our soft palate actually bends downward and meets the pharynx forming a seal.

In Ally’s case, there was a hole at the side when she speaks, which explains why she sounds like she’s grunting at times.  Ally has been in regular speech therapy since she was 6 months old but no amount of therapy is going to help her with this as it’s now a structural issue. Before we ran these tests, we thought her grunting and snorting were just bad speech habits that she had picked up. Now we know she has Velopharyngeal insufficiency or VPI for short. The question is, do we put her through another surgery to close up the hole?

I am inclined to put her through it and continue with speech therapy but we won’t make any decisions till we meet with her surgeon in May. Honestly if you met Ally you would have never guessed that she has speech issues. Not only does she sound ” normal” she has a wide vocabulary and speaks articulately. Occasionally you might be able to pick up her grunting or snorting if you are observant enough. But due to that hole, she will always have trouble making high pressure sounds like ” s, z, sh….etc”

Important decisions have to be made, but we’re going to wait and consult her plastic surgeon before making our decision.
 

I Wish I Could Read His Mind

It’s been awhile since I’ve sat down to write something. Max has been testing the limits of my patience on a daily basis. One could argue that its the terrible 2s/3s, on the other hand people have been saying its middle child syndrome. Whatever it is, its tiring. I wake up in the morning with all good intentions to try and be patient and understanding with him. By the 5th time he has thrown a tantrum, all good intentions have flown out the window. He is being openly defiant and at times, rude. Nap and bedtimes have become a battle as well. I really wish he could express his feelings , or better yet, if I could read his mind. I know he wants to spend time with me and I’m trying, even for a couple of minutes each day. Our bedtime routine hasn’t changed, I have held firm with that. He fights his sleep nearly every night even though he is so tired. I’m more worried that he’s not getting enough sleep than anything else.

On days where he is once again my sweet little boy, we have a great time together. Other days I feel like he has morphed into this little monster whom I have no idea how to deal with. I thought it was just me but even my mom has commented that she finds him difficult to deal with at times. And that’s saying a lot cos grandma is a lot more patient than I am.

When I’ve had a particularly bad day with Max, I’m racked with mommy guilt. I feel bad that I’ve yelled at him, that I haven’t spent enough time with him..etc. I hope he knows I’m trying my very best.

Max with his new hair cut, wearing a Mama made shirt

 

Speech Videofluroscopy

The day finally came for Ally’s speech videofluroscopy. She needed to have it done so that her speech therapist and plastic surgeon could check the movement and length of her soft palate and decide what needs to be done next. We made this appointment a month ago and I have been gently prepping her for it. I knew she would have no problems sitting through the X-ray, but the barium insertion was another story. They would insert a small tube into her nostril and she would have to swallow the barium, this allows the structures in the mouth and throat to be clearly seen on the X-ray. Ally is good with most medical procedures but I knew this would be stretching her limits. She was scared and asked if it would hurt, I didn’t lie to her, I just told her it would be uncomfortable.

Her speech therapist asked her to lie down on the X-ray table and showed her the syringe and tube which would go into her nose. First she dropped one tiny drop, Ally swallowed it without any problems. I was a bit alarmed to see that she had drawn out 5ml of the solution, in my mind I was thinking there is no way Ally was going to let her insert that much!

Then the time came for the real thing. She pumped a little bit more liquid into her nose, as expected Ally gagged and struggled. Her whole face turned red but she didn’t cry, we had her favourite penguin beside her and I was holding onto her hand. Once she swallowed that liquid we had to do the other nostril. Again she gagged and spat some of it out , it was clearly uncomfortable for her but she held back her tears. Luckily she had swallowed enough and we didn’t have to subject her to it anymore.

Once they got her into position, she had to repeat the phases that her therapist said. Oh, did I forget to mention that we had to remove her earrings? This cause more tears and drama than the barium insertion itself! She finally allowed me to take them off and we could continue with the X-ray. It was really cool watching all of it on the TV, I could see all her bones, the structure of her mouth, and lots of other things that I couldn’t identify. From the X-ray you could clearly see that her lower jaw has still some way to catch up with the upper. Once the lateral view was done, her therapist decided that we needed to insert more barium. Since she cried when I had to remove her earrings, her tears had diluted the solution and it wasn’t showing up clearly on the X-rays. When they gently explained it to her, you could see she was very upset but she bravely held back her tears and nodded her head. My heart went out to her , she behaved so bravely and maturely for her age. It went a lot smoother the 2nd time round, I guess she knew what to expect and didn’t gag so much.

After the whole procedure was done, we bought her a present as promised and told her how proud we all were of her. She still has a nasal scope coming up at the end of the month, I’m hoping that would go as smoothly as the X-ray.