Category Archives: Max

Max And His Twin

Max has started school this year and I am happy to say that he has settled in extremely well. His teachers have commented that he is well-behaved and attentive during lessons. Unfortunately, while he is an angel in school, his mischievous twin rears its head at home.

As a baby, Max was a dream, easy-going, always happy. He blended into our family seamlessly and was an absolute delight. Even at age 2 where many parents experience the terrible 2s, he was still the same placid easy going boy. When he hit 3, his twin appeared. One minute he would be sweet as pie, the next he would be screaming murder.

As he got older, his temper became worse. Whenever he is angry, he would hit out at the nearest object/person next to him. He would have these screaming fits where you can just see his anger and frustration. Honestly , I felt lost. I never experienced such things with Ally and really didn’t know what to do. So I tried to be more firm with him, that didn’t work, I tried to be less firm with him, that didn’t work. I deliberately kept him home with me an extra year to spend time with him and to hopefully work on helping manage his emotions.  After a whole day of tantrum throwing and screaming fits, I felt like I have failed.

He is by far a horrible child, in fact when his temper is in check, he is such fun to be around. The problem is his evil twin appears without warning and just as quickly as it appears, it then disappears. The whining and defiance really gets me upset and then I start fighting his anger with mine which we all know, never works.

I am at a loss at what to do, I do hope that this is really just a phase that he would outgrow as he matures and learns to control his temper and emotions.

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Undeserving

I lose my temper with them more often than I should. At times I choose my computer over playing games with my children.  I forget to praise them when they deserve it but I’m quick to point out their faults and wrong doings. Yet tonight, while putting Ally to bed, she grabbed me and gave me a tight hug. Then she whispered in my ear ” You are the best mama I could ever want”

I felt so undeserving…. and so grateful for their unconditional love .

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Weaning Time

Luke is going to be 6 months old soon, in the last few weeks he has started to show a great interest in our food. I was looking through old pictures and found some of Max . Let’s just hope Luke will be a much better eater than his brother.

 

One of his first foods, ripe banana

Still a favourite till today, steam broccoli and cheese

I miss his baby face

I can’t remember what he had that day, rice? Mash potato?

Oh yes, baby led weaning can be VERY messy

 

 

 

 

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Fire ! Fire!

Like most boys, Max loves fire engines. I’ve heard and read about the open houses that the fire stations hold every Saturday morning so I took Max to the Yishun Fire Station as a surprise.

We reached there around 9.30am and we were the only people there for the open house. The firemen were busy with their work but they quickly obliged with a tour of the facilities. I had both the boys with me and two of them actually babysat Luke while Max and I had our tour. All the staff were extremely friendly and patient with the boys.

He was thrilled to have a chance to explore the fire engine

He loved playing with the steering wheel

I was pleasantly surprise by the friendliness of the staff and the informative tour. Even though it was just Max and myself, they showed us all around and let Max explore all the different vehicles.

The highlight of the morning was definitely the hose. They set it up for the children and needless to say Max had a blast ( pun intended)

He didn’t want to put the hose down

At the end of the tour they even posed for a group photograph with the boys!

Max had such a great time that he asked me to take him back the following week. Once again we were the only people there for the open house and they gladly set up the hose for him again. This time he was given a firemen’s hat and jacket which he refused to take off for the rest of the morning.

 

 

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The Battle With Max

Recently I’ve been tearing my hair out trying to understand my son. Max has been whiny, argumentative and difficult which is very unlike him. I guess we could attribute it to Luke’s arrival but who knows? I’ve been trying to spend more time with him, to be more patient with him but I have to admit, it isn’t easy.

Right now, nap and bedtimes are the worst. He used to go to bed by himself, after a kiss goodnight, he would settle down and got to sleep. Now he whines about not being tired, he tosses and turns, he disturbs Ally, basically he does everything but sleep. It can take up to an hour for him to fall asleep. He is clearly tired, you can see his eye bags and he’s yawning away but trust me, that boy can sure fight fatigue.

I keep telling myself its a phase that he’ll grow out of. He is at an awkward stage at the moment as well, he’s not going to school like Ally and yet he isn’t the baby anymore. There are days where I feel like a terrible mother, simply because I feel like all I’ve done is nag/scold him.

It’s not all bad, there are days where my sweet boy emerges once again and we have great fun together. Beneath the whining and tantrums, he really is a sensitive soul who loves his brother and sister.

He looks so grown up in this photo, I love that cheeky look on his face

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Polar Opposites

My two boys, such polar opposites

Luke at 2.5 months, weighing a hefty 7.5kg

Max, 3.5 years, 11kg

 

 

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Just Some Photos

Max and Luke have both been down with a bad cold/cough, thankfully both boys are on the mend. It didn’t stop us from having some outdoor fun at the Botanics, we had beautiful weather, overcast but no rain.

The boys playing hide and seek

Who knew umbrellas could provide so much entertainment?

You can’t see me

Max honestly thought he had the best hiding spot

This was taken on our ” Max and Mama’s day out” at his request, we went to the airport and sat the sky train no less than 10 times

Both kids waiting for Daddy to come home from work

If you’re wondering why there are no pictures of Luke, its because he was mostly asleep in his stroller. My not so little man is now a whopping 7.2kg at 2 months, pictures to come soon.

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I Wish I Could Read His Mind

It’s been awhile since I’ve sat down to write something. Max has been testing the limits of my patience on a daily basis. One could argue that its the terrible 2s/3s, on the other hand people have been saying its middle child syndrome. Whatever it is, its tiring. I wake up in the morning with all good intentions to try and be patient and understanding with him. By the 5th time he has thrown a tantrum, all good intentions have flown out the window. He is being openly defiant and at times, rude. Nap and bedtimes have become a battle as well. I really wish he could express his feelings , or better yet, if I could read his mind. I know he wants to spend time with me and I’m trying, even for a couple of minutes each day. Our bedtime routine hasn’t changed, I have held firm with that. He fights his sleep nearly every night even though he is so tired. I’m more worried that he’s not getting enough sleep than anything else.

On days where he is once again my sweet little boy, we have a great time together. Other days I feel like he has morphed into this little monster whom I have no idea how to deal with. I thought it was just me but even my mom has commented that she finds him difficult to deal with at times. And that’s saying a lot cos grandma is a lot more patient than I am.

When I’ve had a particularly bad day with Max, I’m racked with mommy guilt. I feel bad that I’ve yelled at him, that I haven’t spent enough time with him..etc. I hope he knows I’m trying my very best.

Max with his new hair cut, wearing a Mama made shirt

 

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Meal Time Survival 101

I had this whole meal thing down pat, taking Ally and Max out to lunch on my own was second nature by now. Most days I could get all 3 of us fed without much drama. Then we had Luke and suddenly meal times became complicated affairs.

Taking 3 young children out for lunch on your own is a feat in itself. First location is very important, hawker centers are out of the question cos a) the pram doesn’t fit at any of the tables,  b) either one or both children are slipping off those little round seats since they have to perch on them to reach the table and c) poor Luke will be melting in his pram by the time we are done eating.

So that leaves us with food courts or restaurants. When one is at a food court, it’s all about location. You need to find a table that close enough to the stalls you are buying from so that you can keep an eye on the kids. This can be tricky if one child wants to eat something at this end of the food court and the other child wants something at the other end. What does one do? You either tell the kids to choose food from stalls in the vicinity or you take all the troops with you to one stall, buy the food, walk them to the other end , find a table and get everyone settled while you buy food for second child. By this time you probably look harassed and overwhelmed and hopefully some kind soul will help you carry your tray.

Even the type of food that you have to buy can pose a problem. Suppose you need to buy something from this end and walk over with kids in tow to the other. Now , if its a rice dish that isn’t too bad, but what if its a bowl of steaming hot noodles? Do you attempt to carry the tray with one hand while pushing the pram with the other and at the same time shouting at the other two kids to follow you? I choose to ask the stall holder to help me carry the tray, at least I know I won’t end up burning one of my kids! Most of the time they are willing to help but of course you get the odd one or two who couldn’t give a damn.

Once the food is actually bought, cut up and served to the kids, now its time to feed yourself. Gone are the days of buying what you actually felt like eating. Now I choose foods that I can either eat with one hand or gobble down in 10 minutes. No more hot soups for me! The meal goes rather smoothly if Luke stays asleep, but should he wake up in between then that’s when I wish I could grow an extra set of arms. Luckily for me, Ally is old enough to eat on her own and loves her food so I don’t have to constantly remind her to stop day dreaming and eat. Max is a different story, he can feed himself but will take forever and will fidget, day-dream and do about a 100 other things besides eat. So I end up feeding him half the time to make things quicker. Take today for example, we were all having lunch when Luke woke up and needed a feed. So while I fed Luke, I was trying to feed Max and myself all at the same time. By the time lunch was finished, I was ready for bed.

If Matt is around that makes thing much easier, in fact we can even have a decent conversation over meal times. Sometimes we end up playing what I call ” pass the baby” which just means one of us carries Luke and tries to feed ourself while the other manages the two older kids. Then we do a swap so the person carrying Luke can now finally use both hands to try and finish his/her meal.

Is it tough handling all 3 on my own during meal times? Of course it is! But I know it’s one of those things that won’t last forever. As the kids get older it would hopefully get easier , in the meantime , I’ve better master the art of speed eating.

 

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That Elusive Sleep

The poor little man has been having some tummy troubles. He spent most of yesterday crying and spitting up. When he did manage to fall asleep, he would wake up a couple of minutes later crying in pain.

I can't believe he is already 5 weeks old

My other little man has been waking up nightly, crying for no apparent reason. Then he would go back to sleep only to wake up at the crack of dawn. I keep telling myself ” its just a phase….”

Unlike Ally, he takes a long time to fall asleep and seems to only need a quick cat nap to recharge his batteries.

I’m hoping that we’ll all get more uninterrupted sleep soon!

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