All my babies were carried A LOT in the early days. Ally had her medical issues and no one had the heart to leave her to cry. I was still working during that time and poor Grandma had to carry Ally for at least 6-8 hours a day till her wrist ache. But then nothing else could comfort her and the poor child was in so much pain from her reflux.
When Max came along I fed him on demand during the early days. When he cried I picked him up, he slept in a crib next to our bed and at times co-slept with us. Well meaning friends and relatives used to say ” Don’t keep carrying him, you’ll spoil him”
When you think about it, a baby has been in the safe secure womb for the last 9 months or so, suddenly they are thrust into this strange world and expected to be independent little people. I always say it’s the smart ones that cry and demand for their parent’s attention. They crave what they are familiar with, the smells and sounds of their parents. I honestly don’t believe you can spoil a newborn, their needs and wants are the same. Right now with Luke, he’s fed on demand as well and carried each time he cries. Sure it’s tiring especially with two older children but the poor little guy is only 2 weeks old. I don’t have the heart to let him cry till he runs out of tears. The only exception is when I’m driving, if I know he’s hungry and we’re far from home, I usually pull over somewhere safe to feed him first. If not he just has to wait till we get home.
While I say it’s not possible to spoil a newborn, it is possible to over indulge a baby. Between 9 months to a year, we start to set limits for the children. At nap/ bedtimes, they are placed in their cots, sleepy but not asleep. Slowly they learn to fall asleep on their own. With Ally we used to carry her till she fell asleep and it was exhausting for all of us. Finally we managed to teach her to fall asleep on her own. Second time round we were a little wiser and started the routine earlier. Max was also a more easy going chap with no medical issues which made things simpler.
To everyone who says I’m spoiling my baby by carrying him to much and responding to his every need, I just want to say, thanks for your advice but I’m going to do it my way, at least for the next 9 months. Luke is our last baby and while I can still comfort him with a cuddle, hug or kiss, I’m going to savor that opportunity and do so.